We get to the boatowner's (Jazz) lovely house overlooking a limb of the Bayou and head down to the dock. There, suspended above the water, was the Joker 1, ready and waiting for us to lower it into the water and take it out for its Spring 2006 debut. Within 15 minutes we were off, Cal and I in the back two seats and Jazz at the wheel, regaling us with stories of the different folks who owned the several million dollar homes we were passing on the way out to the open water.
"Grab your camera!" Jazz suddenly cries. Cal and I stand up and look ahead to see a school of dolphins not 15 feet from our boat, playing and splashing and having a grand old time. It was my first reminder that we weren't in a lake, the only other body of water I had ever been out in by boat. In a lake you see a fish or two. Dolphins, though? Now that was cool.
About that time, however, our luck began to change. Our attention was fixed on the sea creatures around us when, with a little hesitation so as not to sound whiny or alarmed, Cal ventures this statement: "Um, Jazz? Should I be ankle-deep in water back here?"
Jazz glances back, unconcerned, and mutters something about rain in the boat. However, as he does so, he notices that it's not just a little excess water, it is -literally- up to Cal's ankles. He turns the boat around to head back towards the dock (now a good ways away) while trying to keep up a nonchalant attitude, still exclaiming over the dolphins and teasing Cal about his wet shoes. Cal and I, though, could sense that things might be a little more serious than this retired Colonel was letting on.
Our fears were confirmed when, after the motor started sputtering a bit, Jazz let out a few choice words, cut the boat off, stripped down to his skivvies (not real sure what skivvies are, but I'm fairly certain those were them), and dove -without warning- into the water behind the boat.
Let me clarify: it's spring, and it's Florida. However... remember my last post? About cool temperatures and unbeachlike weather? Right. Well, that's what we're out in on this particular day, and, well, let's just say that the water isn't exactly ripe for swimming. Our beautiful, perfect Sunday afternoon was, uh, sinking. Fast.
Jazz pushes (yes, pushes) the quickly-submerging boat to the nearest dock and commands us (as only military men can) to get out. He has to get the boat back to his house, he says. Walk along the banks and meet him there.
Cal and I proceed to follow his orders (as only folks can do when given them by military men). We traipse through yard after yard of rich folks living in luxury in the coveted (and rare) waterfront properties. We run into a couple problems such as fences blocking our way (at which time we had to walk up to the house, through the front yard, and back down the other side) and a concerned old rich lady drinking her mint julips on her front porch and watching the drama unfold.
"Is his boat taking water?" she asks between sips.
"Yes ma'am," I reply. "Sorry we're walking through your beautiful yard."
"It's okay," she says, still distracted by the distant sight of a near-naked Jazz pulling his boat by its rope through the deep water, sputtering and breathing heavily as he swims.
Finally, Cal and I get back to Jazz's dock, only seconds before he gets there. Cal helps him get the boat raised again and we stand in a daze as gallons of water drain out into the dark waters of the bayou. Upon inspection, Jazz realizes that his son (a student at FSU) has left a cap off of some part of the motor, and that has been what's caused the problem. We got to witness the angry phone call that Jazz made to said son. Poor son.
Through it all, I didn't really think too much about having been in any danger. However, as we were leaving, Cal thought to ask Jazz how long it would've been before we would've sunk in that boat. The answer? 10 minutes. 10 minutes!
We're trying again tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed. And pray...
I think I'll wear my swimsuit.
5 comments:
Holy cow, I laughed out loud... Go rent "Open Water" and you will definitely not make a second attempt at an ocean cruise.
Fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. Great story. (And glad y'all made it to land safely!)
Awesome. I was hoping while I was down there the other week that I'd meet an element of danger in sharks swimming too closely (for most people's comfort) to the Destin beaches. But, alas! it was not meant to be. Glad I could live some beach danger vicariously through your story!
We saw sharks! Close to the shore! Two of them!
(Actually, I didn't see them. I was on the beach staring at the HUGE school of fish that had just swum up to the shore, thinking "There are probably sharks in there," when I looked up to my parents' 6th floor balcony to see them pointing and shrieking for folks to get out of the water. There were, apparently, two big ones right in the middle of that school of fish. 15 feet in front of where I was standing on the beach. crazy.)
I will never swim in the ocean again.
Post a Comment